I can't believe it's been nearly two months since I've poured out words and feelings on my blog. They have been here, inside me, just not out on paper... or on screen, so to speak. So many things are happening right now, and it's hard to keep up with all I need to keep up with.
I used to be so good at multi-tasking... at handling whatever came my way no matter what. Maybe it's age. Or winter. Or both. Or neither. I have been tired. Tired when I get up, tired during the day, tired at night. I am falling asleep here at my laptop as I write, so please excuse any typos. :)
All in all, I have handled things with strength... not mine, but God's through me. Since 2007 I have been a caretaker for my daughter and her family as she underwent critical diagnoses as well as a high-risk pregnancy, brain surgery, and spinal surgery. And her conditions are ongoing. But she is an amazing woman. Such an inspiration to me! I thought more than once that she would die in my arms. Then my Mom did die in my arms... and in my brothers. My world as I knew it unraveled as I moved more than once across the state with my life in boxes and bags. New job, new friends, new life. And then, just as swiftly, God weaved it all back together for me. I married my teenage love in 2011, and I found my smile again. Then he was diagnosed with an invasive monster this past November. But it's not going to steal away the joy in my soul. In our souls. Ever. And that's the short version! Yes, not in my strength, but in God's through me. I am so thankful for every new day I'm given. I want to use them well, and full. Tired or not, I want to soak it all in. I don't want to miss a thing.
There is so much swirling around in my head, that it's hard to bring it all to a peace in the quiet night hours. But when my head rests against my pillow, God takes me to dreamland in an instant. I just wish I could stay there longer some days.
If I were operating on my own power, I would have run out of juice years ago. But God believes in me, so I do, too. If He thinks I can, that's good enough for me. For I want to please my Father, my Savior, my Source of Strength.
And He's given me the wisdom to make sound decisions... Like knowing it's time to stop rambling through my fingers and go to bed so I can enjoy the blessing of a brand new day. I want to enjoy and savor every sunrise and every sunset, and all that's inbetween. In all reality, just how cool is that?!? :)
Love and Blessing to All... Goodnight.
Cheri ♥
