I have been hidden from the cyber world for a while now... by choice. Life is full and overflowing of late. And though I know God doesn't give us more than we can handle, I have felt so close. Close to the edge, but closer to Him. I find the quietness fulfilling. I stay in my quilt room while I'm home, though I haven't created anything in a long time. Can't seem to do it right now. That part of me is in hiding somewhere.Rob has had a rest from chemo though the cancer continues to grow. We will find more direction for this by the end of this month.
The company I work for is going through major changes... none of us know whether we will have our jobs or not. That will be answered in the next month or two.
My little brother lays in a hospital bed tonight on his birthday, hours away from all his siblings, alone and toughing out the fear. I miss him greatly. Daily.
And I'm nursing a bad cold from some little munchkins that I shared camp with at church this past week... But I really don't mind that, because the blessings I received from these little ones far outweigh this cold.
And my Colie has silently dealt with so much pain so far this summer, though she will not let Chiari win, and continues to push on and live her life. My hero, my beautiful Princess Warrior. She inspires me continually.
I moved to a new office and moved from part-time to full-time in hopes of saving my job (and insurance). Not sure it was the best thing to do... I am tired and spent. Always. But I am working with some beautiful ladies who know the Lord. God puts us where He wants us to be. Where we need to be.
Having said all that, I am filled with hope and peace... in all things. No matter what happens -- no matter what -- everything is in God's hands, part of a bigger plan that only He can see. And I don't have fear.
I am filled and being cradled and guided. And I am good with that.
So... this summer has been HOT. I am not a HOT lover. I am an Autumn girl. An up north girl. A quiet hike in the woods girl. A log cabin, fire in the hearth girl. A sweater girl. One who shares an excitement with her daughter for the coming beauty of God-painted trees and Winnie-the-Pooh days of blustery breezes. It revives our souls!
A few months ago there was a noticeably perfect day... It was a Sunday, and the sun was out, mid-seventies, wind blowing across my face and through my hair as I closed my eyes and faced it softly head on. I tearfully and joyfully thanked God for life and love and beautiful days, as I was filled with strength to carry on.
Then in church one Sunday morning in June, as we were lifting our voices in worship, I was filled to overflowing, and I saw a glimpse of Heaven... that's all I can say. I don't know how or why, but for that beautiful, forever second, there was glory and good and joy -- I was humbled and filled with peace for whatever days lay ahead.
I don't know what's coming or not coming, what will happen or not, what the future holds near or far. But I do know that it will all be good, no matter what. Because God causes all things to work for good for those who love Him.
And I do.
Future...
So I will continue to be alone and quiet, and wait patiently, and listen carefully for the still small Voice. I will keep trying to get through my piles of papers... or keep falling asleep on them.
I listen to music at night, I read, I pray (lots). I make lists and try to accomplish more than I can. I day dream and I get lost in thought. And I sleep when I want to stay awake, and find dark hours when I should be resting that are out of grasp.
Thoughts going on and swirling freely about, getting lost in the music that touches deeply to my very core. Tears over memories lost, and a healing heart that continues to beat on and on. Being rocked to the beat in the arms of Love.It really is quite a beautiful and comforting place to be.
I'll be back soon. I've much to do in good time.
Love Always, in All Ways
Cheri ♥
*Stock photos above
